unhealed trauma ruining your relationships? ❤️‍🩹

I know yall know what I'm talking about! This was a topic that was so needing to be discussed because of how common it is today. Miscommunication to no communication, constant need of reassurance, never feeling secure in your relationships, always on guard, or unable to waaaallk awayyyy. It a few more that we will talk about as I write along. But seriously why is it that we have these problems and where can they possibly come from? Ding ding ding, your past. It's okay we all have experienced this, even me your reader. When we do this we tend to push past thing like it meant nothing, swallowing the pain and acting as if nothing happened. Beyonce is legendary lyric " I can have another you in a minute , matter of fact he'll be here in a minute, babyy" Girl once she left that mannn she had another one right behind him! City Girl +1000 poinntss lol. However the point to this is that she show no remorse and went on the next man with those unhealed wounds. Swallowing that pain and acted as if nothing happened. And then queen blessed us with the "Lemonade" album and showed us what not healing do in relationships.

Unhealed Childhood Trauma is a common factor why relationships going sour. You may have been a victim of emotional, verbal, physical abuse or a witness of this. Common in masculines, those who haven't had a nurturing healthy relationships with their mothers grow up to having intimacy issues and showing affection. Another is they can grow up to wanting too much of your attention developing control/abandonment issues. An absent mother can be another cause of this as well. Having a partner who has these traumas can develop coldness in the relationship if it is left unresolved. Common in women, low self esteem can be developed as well from lack of recognition or compassion shown from love ones. Trauma can make it difficult for them to trust, communicate, and feel safe with their partners. Which can lead to self-destructive behaviors, such as pushing their partner away or becoming overly reliant on them. That's why ladies it is important to go to therapyyyy can help you address and heal from past traumas, which can improve their relationships and overall well-being.

Here are some signs that your relationship may be suffering from unhealed trauma:

• Difficulty communicating and expressing emotions

• Frequent arguments or conflicts over small issues

• Avoiding certain topics or activities due to past trauma

• Trust issues and difficulty building or maintaining trust

• Emotional detachment or shutting down during conflict

• Difficulty with intimacy or feeling safe during physical touch

• Fear or anxiety around certain people or situations that trigger past trauma

• Feeling stuck or unable to move past past trauma in the relationship.

how to heal together 🦋

Patience is the key. You have to be patient with your person, progress does not happen overnight. Now I'm saying this to those who have someone who is WILLING. And when I say willing I mean not forced. Nobody ever gonna do right by you if it is forced on them. Allow yourself to know when to walk away. Change will never come if the foundation doesn't change. Like I said before It's going to require patience, yes this will be a challenge that why you both have to be WILLING.

The first step is to express your feelings and needs openly and honestly. This usually requires listeninggg and I mean uninterrupted listening, not you trying to get the last word or your point. Empathy on both sides. It is critical to avoid blame and criticism and instead focus on working together to find solutions. It is also critical for healing to create a safe and supportive environment. This can include setting boundaries, expressing gratitude, and practicing forgiveness.

Consider the following steps to help heal from past trauma together:

• Recognize the trauma and its effects on your lives.

• Communicate your emotions openly and honestly.

• Seek professional assistance if necessary.

• Take care of yourself and encourage others to do the same.

• Make a welcoming and safe environment.

• Work on forgiving and letting go of resentment.

• Discover healthy coping mechanisms for triggers and difficult emotions.

• Celebrate any and all progress and growth.

If you ever want advice and guidance on where to start and if your connection is salvageable book me for a separation meeting 🤍

https://linktr.ee/empressliyah_